little things

26 February ’19, Tuesday
12:38 am

Hi there

Welcome to another day of my not so happening life haha. Yes, I’m laughing at myself. Laughing at my life.

I have a feeling soon I’d have so so many regrets in life. Right now too I was thinking about this only sigh. I don’t want to live this kind of life. A life where I confine myself, strangle the me me, who has been dying to come outside and breathe freely.

Also, I want a cbf, yeah, only I’d know what it means (and one more person). Find me a cbf soon, okay? Please, pretty please.
I’ve even lost so much weight now (tbh it’s a fair amount, not a lot, but a few kilos). I look alright.

Maybe, I should be a better person, then? Maybe not really a better person, I should sin. It’s high time now.

I haven’t lived my life. I want to live. I want to live my life, universe. I want to live. I want to be free. I want to scream, scream out of joy. Scream, top of my lungs. Not give a flying fuck about what others say, think about me. I want to be free.

I was thinking that I haven’t really lived my life in the true sense. And I’d get married soon. And maybe that’d be an end to my life, to this life. It would be another life then. I’d have kids and then I’d live for them. Having never ever lived my life fully. I still live in the past. I never live in the present. It’s never the spectacular now. Why not? Why J? Why not?

When I was a kid I always looked at these pretty girls (mainstream, generic pretty), and I wanted to be like them. Not there yet, but on my way. I want to be bold and brave.
Bold. Brave. And beautiful. 

Live J
Live your life. Live